So this is me. To a t. Right now. You too?
I've been taking a bit of a breather over on Facebook. Well, really...on everything.
I used to check it all day long. On my phone. On my computer.
It's so addicting. And I realized that.
And yes, it's so hilarious to me that I used to own a social networking company.
A few months ago, I removed the app from my phone. That felt good. Really good.
Then I was still checking it online. On my phone. On safari.
Such a cheater.
So I erased that bookmark too. That felt better. Great, actually.
No more Facebook on my phone. Can you believe that? Done and done.
I dare you to try it.
And so began, 'My season of No!'
I'm learning to just be in the moment with the kids.
Maybe make a daily to-do list and get what I can get to.
Not fret over what I can't get done around the house.
Many mornings there are still dishes from the night before and an overflowing laundry basket.
So what? Nope. Not that important.
One day I'll have my house back...clean, orderly, tidy and neat.
Right now I want to focus. Enjoy their company. Their smiles. Their laughter. Their words.
Nash is now saying, 'Umm excuse me Momma but please get off your phone.'
Nothing like some toddler words to put you in your place. Make you realize. Make you step back. Make you analyze. Make you evaluate.
And one thing my precious Clover has certainly made me realize is how quickly time is flying by.
So I've chosen to be with them, enjoying them. Putting all else aside. Except Walt. He's first and always will be. He just doesn't really ask for a lot. Demand much. Seriously, such a good man...
I'm also not insanely busy with commitments. In fact, I've chosen to have very few during this life stage. Because I'm busy enough being his wife. Their Mom. And Zola's mom.
I call this life stage, 'My season of NO!'
Sounds harsh. It's not. I'm just not making myself or the children frantic with busy. Some weeks we don't leave the house. Ever. And I'm ok with that. And they're actually so much more calm and content during those weeks.
Many friends harped on me for not having Nash in some sort of MDO/Preschool when Clover was born. I questioned whether we should start looking. And once Clover was born I had a good cry about how much I wished Nash was in school. In MDO. In somebody else's house. Really, truly just anywhere. Other than here. At our house. Being naughty. And making me tired. I remember having those thoughts. All so I could have just a few hours alone.
But that quickly melted away when Clover was a few months old. But it was a long few months. As soon as he got used to his new sister, he was obsessed. And now he can't get enough of her. And I'm so thankful I don't have to cart him off somewhere. Because that's what I don't like. Doing that dance makes me frantic.
What do I mean? Because carting off means free time for me, right? Alone time. Time without a crazy toddler. Away from his non-stop energy. I agree, this is all appealing on some days. But I don't like the rush of it all. The crazy frantic rush doesn't outweigh those few and far between hard days. The packing both kids up in the car. The working around Clover's nap schedule. The snow days. The inconsistency of Nash's naps. The consistency of hers.
And I'm so thankful that we are all totally fine during this season of no. No we are not doing school. No we only have one commitment, MOPS. And that's only every other Friday, at most. We are home, just being. We are boring. We are together. We are not go, go, going. We are being fun. Being silly. Being lazy. Being active. Being a family.
For the few commitments I've had with two children, I find myself being a drill sergeant, barking orders: 'Get dressed! Brush your teeth. Open up! Let's comb your hair. No spraying the mirror. Stand still, stand still, stand still! Finish your breakfast. Where are your shoes? Did you poop? Pick out your diaper. Lay down. Don't move, don't move! Hands up! Stop moving!'
I mean seriously, y'all. Tired yet? Me too. And that would only be about 10 min of the rush hour before packing us into the car. No! Thank! You!
So for my season of no, so much of this is avoided. We have play dates at the house. We get Nash OUT of the house during the day on Saturday and Sunday for some alone time with each parent. Sometimes we venture out to the park. We take walks. We play in the yard. With sticks. And rocks. And paper towel rolls. And Walt's old work gloves. And we visit with neighbors.
Oh and thank the Lord for amazing neighbors. God has blessed my life with another stay at home Mom three doors down from us. So awesome, right? We switch off toddler watching two days a week. That means I have a toddler free day (I'm a whirling dervish while Clover naps on those days) and another day where I'm entertaining two toddlers (Nash and our neighbor's daughter.)
For now, my cup runneth over just being a homemaker and using Instagram as a creative outlet. A way to connect. A time capsule of daily captures.
I do miss communicating with everyone and peeking into everybody's life via Facebook. But not miss it enough because it really was a huge time suck. A life suck. Something that wasn't making me a truly better person. Even if I'm browsing on Pinterest, at least it's for bettering me. Our life. Our house. Facebook just wasn't doing that for me. So for now, at most, I'm maybe checking it twice a day. During their naps and in the evening before I relax with my man. That's it. And y'all know that's huge. Admit it, you were a junkie just like me. I dare you to count how many times you browse your newsfeed a day. Get ready to be possibly shocked.
Y'all, I'm not saying this is for everyone but taking a step back has been really awesome. And I wanted you to be 'in the know' about where we've disappeared to.
It's just a temporary season of no and I'm ok with that. Nash will one day start school. And life will get busy with carpool lines, PTA and extracurriculars. I know this. I want that. It's who I am.
And one day I'll get back to blogging again. On a more consistent basis. And writing again too. Oh how I love and miss writing. And sharing. And teaching. And working out. And photography. With my big camera. Not just my iPhone. But guess what? Like I told you before...there'll be time for that!
So for now my calling is being with these lovely munchkins and packing our days with adventures and memories. And staying home with them is such a blessing. And saying NO to commitments has become almost addicting. Just saying no. And not even flinching. Because I know this season of no will be gone in the blink of an eye. Then I'll yearn for it back, in some ways. Clearly not all of it. Look at all I might've missed, down below.
Share with me now. How to you juggle it all? Are you in a season of no? Trapped in a season of yes? Do you feel overwhelmed with commitments? Life's daily to-do list? I'd love to hear your secrets. How do you balance it all successfully?
Or better yet. Take the SEASON OF NO challenge. Say no to something, anything, once a week, for a month.
Some ideas: a volunteering gig, your child's un-needed extracurricular, Facebook, opt-out of some annoying emails in your inbox, that friend that sucks the life out of you...don't see her or him. Just say no. Analyze those things that aren't worth their weight. Then one by one, drop it like it's hot. (Yep, I did.)
See how good it feels even thinking about it? Yeah, I see you smiling. It's totally addicting. You'll be a junkie before you know it. Seriously, you think Facebook is addicting? Just wait. Season of no is where it's at, people. You'll be spitting out no's like a boss. I promise. The total opposite of THIS guy.
See these precious people. They're mine. All mine. And nothing is bigger, better. Nothing tops them. I captured these, because I'm saying no to other...way less important things. Yep, I'm loving me some no, y'all!